Sunday, November 27, 2011

My Paper Angel Story - One From The Heart

(This was written November 20, 2011)


For those of my friends who really know me, you know everything I am about to post on the rest of this entry is nothing but the truth. I am a very simple person. I don’t like having to put on a “game face” when it comes to life. I don’t use all the “eloquent” words the narrators use to tell stories. I just know how to write it and tell it from my heart as I see it.

Yes, I love to get all dolled up every chance I get. But I would rather be in my jeans and t-shirts and flip flops any given day. When I am dressed down, I don’t have to worry about some one else feeling any less than I am because of the way I look. Because their clothes don’t look as fancy as mine, I don’t want them to think I am any better than they are. I am not better than any one. Yes, I have proved recently I can still get red carpet ready in just a matter of a few minutes. Then, in five minutes I can go from the red carpet to riding four-wheelers.

That is just me…

Life is a matter of enjoying the journey and making a difference. Be remembered for what you did to change some one else’s life. If all you are about is trying to get the biggest house on the block, the most expensive car on the market, or the biggest bank account in town… That is all you will be remembered for. When your life is over, all those things you worked all your life to get will be left for your family to either sell or fight over. After you have taken your last breath, all those things are now just things again. The meaning as well as the purpose that they held in your eyes, don’t have the same effect on the other people in your life. Your prize possessions are now just “things that belonged to you” before you left this world without them.

Why not do things to make a difference in the life of another person? There are so many different areas and ages people need help with. Medical needs, groceries, light bills, housing, and even food. I am sweeping off at my own front door step before I sweep around yours. So, don’t click off this topic until you have read the whole thing.

Yes, I have helped with various happenings in and around my town. Most people will never know what I have done. When you do it and then you boast about it, well, you are doing it for the wrong reasons. You are bringing attention to your self. Another little “trophy” of possessions to hang on your wall for the world to see once you are gone. Then everyone will quickly forget them as time fades away. They are not important any more to anyone.

When you can truly leave a mark on someone’s heart and soul by doing something they will remember forever, that is a legacy. I saw a quote on Facebook recently. “You have never really lived until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” Just like in the Bible in Matthew 25:40, “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!” In the Scriptures before this one, it is referring to feeding the hungry. You give to those who are thirsty something to drink to quench their thirst. Even though I was a complete stranger to you, you invited me into your home so I would have a clean place to stay.  I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you took care of me. I was in prison because I had done something wrong, and you still to the time and you visited me.

When a person is broken and down on their luck, why is it so hard to reach out and help them to most people? We are so blessed to be a blessing to others in need. We, at one time or another, have also been down on our luck and have experienced hard times. Do you remember the person who took the time to help you when you were trying to get back up?

I can sit here as I type this and recall a time when some one did something simple for me. I know it was between 2001 and 2003. I don’t remember the exact year but I know Zaxby’s opened up in Douglas in 2001. They just celebrated the 10 year anniversary. It was Christmas time and I went thru the drive thru to get some supper on the way home. I was behind a white Ford Taurus in line. I do believe I know the person who was in the car in front of me. I will never forget her waving to me as she had already gotten her food and was pulling away from the drive thru window. When I got to the window with my money in my hand, the cashier said “Merry Christmas. The girl in the car ahead of you said to tell you Merry Christmas and she paid for your food. She said to tell you her name was _______.” For reasons I refuse to post without contacting that person first before I post her name, I will insert the “__________”. When she tells me I can, I will insert her name! That simple act of kindness was something that brought tears to my eyes. I drove off and I cried all the way home. The meal was less than $10.00 but to me it was worth $1,000,000 because some one had cared enough for me to do that for me. And since I have never thanked her before, I want to take this time now!!! Thank you!!!

I guess I need to begin the meaning behind all of this topic right about now…

As many of my Facebook friends, know, I was supposed to be going on a mission trip to either Hackleburg, Alabama, or Smithville, Mississippi, with the organization called Eight Days of Hope. This mission trip was to rebuild homes for widows who had their homes destroyed with the storms that hit the southeast in April 2011. These ladies did not have any insurance or their insurance did not cover all of the needed repairs. There is another blog subject about all of this on this blog. I was all excited I was going. Then the weekend before I was supposed to go, something just kept pulling at my gut and told me not to go. Not really being sure what it was trying to tell me, I got really upset at myself. I was more embarrassed because I was not going to be going after all. But, now as I watched the week unfold as to the week I was supposed to be there, I know why I didn’t go.

You see, Pastor’s father had to have stints put in. He was shipped out of town on the Wednesday night of that week to another hospital. I sing on the Praise Team at church. Pastor’s wife is our praise and worship leader and our piano player. So she was not able to be in service with us that night. I was able to download some songs with just the soundtracks. We had music to sing by for the worship part of the service.

On the same day, my Mama had an allergic reaction to some type of sinus allergy medicine. Her face was swollen up like a little Ewok off of the Star Wars (Luke Skywalker) series. She literally looked as if she had gotten some Botox shots or a face lift that went majorly wrong. Had I been 450 miles away, I would have killed myself to get back home to see about her.

Then there was the almost incident this past Wednesday. If you haven’t read the blog under “Psalm 139:9-10” yet, you need to read it and you will understand. You see, I had a major part of my vehicle fall off at some unknown time and place. As I was about to leave, I hit a small hole in my front yard and the tie rod end bolt came up out of the tie rod because the $1.62 nut had fallen off. So, there it was dragging the ground while my tire hung on like a loose tooth. HAD I been driving down the dirt road (aka wash board bumpy) or had I been driving down the high way at my normal rate of speed (wide open) when it decided to fall apart… There would have been only one of two outcomes. It is a given, I would have wrecked. NO doubt about that part. But, I would have either had a severely major accident and been badly injured or I would have wound up dead. God knows what He is doing, so I have learned to quit asking questions. Had I been either going or coming home from mission trip, I do not want to even think about that one.

Now, let us back up to the night I decided I was NOT going to be going to the mission trip. October 23, 2011, was the night of my decision. I had gotten home from church and was feeling like a defeated little puppy. I was heart broken to say the least. I cried myself to sleep that night. And boy, when I do that, I look like I the Michelin Man in my eyes the next morning. They poof up really bad. No make up can cover it up. Monday morning, I got up as usual. Fixed my morning dose of Folgers in my cup to perk me up. Instead of going to get a shower, I went to my Daddy’s blue recliner in the living room. That is where I like to go and just think about things. I started the little pity party once again.

I listen to WBYZ 94.5 every morning. I love the station. I have to hear Mike Huckabee’s 8:30 morning news. The local weather. Then Pastor Tommy Daniels from the Ten Mile Creek Baptist Church daily devotion. After the news, DJ Alan DuPriest began his upcoming events he plugs in at this time. It started out like this...

“The Tri County CASA organization will be holding a Holiday Fashion Show Gala in Baxley on November 12, 2011. CASA is the group for the Court Appointed Supporting Adults. They are having this fashion show to raise money for their organization.”

I own a bridal shop located in down town Douglas. Those words really caught my attention. I knew what CASA was about… Helping kids. As soon as I heard “CASA”, God spoke to my heart and all I heard was “Balloon decorations”. Wow, I really need to contact them as soon as I get to work to see about this. I didn’t want to do the fashion show part since others from that area were already doing the fashion part. I wanted to help in other ways.

Then Alan had to go and follow it up with “And the guest speaker for the night will be Country Music Artist Jimmy Wayne……” I will be completely honest, I heard NOTHING else Alan said after that name (Sorry Alan)…

I know Jimmy Wayne’s life story thanks to radio, various magazines, MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, and youtube. I know what he stands for and pretty much what he is all about. I mean, when is the last time YOU walked 1,700 miles across America to raise awareness for kids who age out of foster care??? When kids “age out”, this means the day they turn 18 and are an adult, where ever they are, all of their belongings are brought to them in garbage bags and they are now homeless and on their own. He founded the organization Project Meet Me Halfway (www.projectmmh.org) in 2010. He is also the National Spokesperson for CASA. He is a supporter of the Salvation Army Paper Angel Tree Program due to the fact he was once a Paper Angel himself. He had a life that one around here would never think of a child having to go thru and live thru. Yet he came thru it and is now bringing awareness for other kids. Pretty soon I will have a blog story on him and his foundation!!!

I have a special place in my heart for kids of all ages. I love me some babies all the way to their teens. Having a love for kids and kids liking me is a characteristic my Daddy passed down to me. Kids (babies) who normally don't go to strangers will take up to me. Guess it is the Jesus in me... Up until this past year, I was the Teen Sunday School teacher for two years and I was the Youth Pastor for a while. This year, I became a mentor at the Middle School. I guess that is why I love my job, I always am around the younger girls and I try to be a good role model for them. Then at other times, the parents bring their kids into the shop while they look around. Guess who loves to baby sit??? I have been told I needed at least a dozen!!!

As I heard this, I realized God was possibly opening another door for me to do something good since I was not going to Alabama. Was I fearful of them telling me no they didn’t want any part of me decorating for them and they thought I was stupid for contacting them? OOOOOOHHHHH but YES!!!!!! But I learned many years ago “The only stupid question is the one that is never asked.”

So I got to the store. Told Mama my story of how I was not going to Alabama and how I was going to contact them about decorating in Baxley. It was a risk to take, but I was gonna try. After an email. A phone conversation with Mr. Jim. Then Mrs. Dorothy. I was able to get on board with this event. I went that Monday and met with Mrs. Dorothy to look at the room I would be decorating for. I would have the privilege of decorating the MEET AND GREET ROOM for Jimmy Wayne. I was honored and knew this was a once in a lifetime chance to be able to do something on this scale. I mean, come on, this is South Georgia. Not too often do we have things like this around here!

As I was thinking one day, I decided to take another chance and invite Jimmy Wayne to our church service for that Sunday morning. I did not know his schedule at the time. But I invited him to be a part of the church service. Not to have to come in and speak. I wanted him to have a chance to be able to be in a church service with out any pressure. I mean another, what is the worst thing that could happen… Him say “No”.

His comment to me was completely one of those I never expected to have answered like he did. He replied “I invite your "church" to join me at the salvation army to help with the angel tree program.”

As I read that… I was like… Oh no he did not!?!?! And in a Madea tone “What did you just say???” He just either dared me or challenged me to do something and to make a difference in some one else’s life in the process. And how many of my friends out there really know I TOTALLY LOVE A CHALLENGE!!!!  And I LOVE HELPING OTHERS!!! Combine the two and I am dangerous!!! Just because I am a woman doesn’t mean you have to immediately underestimate me and what I can or can not do! So, let me prove to you what I am capable of!!!

So, what did I do??? I got the phone book, looked up the Douglas area Salvation Army, and left a message for the Manager to call me back. Within the hour, she called me back. This is kinda how my story went “This is Windi from Windi’s Bridal. Faye is my mother (she knows Mama fairly well). I am calling to ask what did I need to do to be able, if it is possible, to get a paper angel tree in my shop for the kids for this Christmas.” She told me she could bring some angels by the next week and she thanked me for doing this. She was amazed that I was really wanting to do this.

As I was hanging up with her, oh yes, I was already logging on to Twitter to tell Jimmy Wayne the news. My message was “I just got off the phone w/ the SA in my town (Douglas). I'm setting up a Paper Angel Tree inside my buz next week. I (we) are on board ;)” I seriously wanted to follow it up with the comment “So, how you like them apples?!?!” Haha.. Sorry, but I was feeling quite cocky!!

His response was “AWESOME!!!!!”.

Finally, the night of the CASA Gala had arrived. I worked about 14 hours in two days playing with 650+ balloons to decorate with. To me, I don’t see anything special about them. I guess the negative thought of “nothing ever being good enough” kept returning to my memory. But everyone has loved them. I have gotten all kinds of comments from people on Facebook, Twitter, in my shop, and those who attended the event. I have never had a group as thankful for the décor that I have done as they all were. Even Jimmy Wayne liked them! If he thanked me one time, he thanked me ten times. Yes, I was in wow mode, but I never got the big head. For them to be sooooooo appreciative of the simplest of things I did, I was humbled beyond words. It was a very humbling experience for me. It really touched my heart to hear and read all the comments. I am still in awe of the whole thing. And you guessed it, I cried at those comments as well ;)

You see, each of us are given talents and gifts from God above. To every person that commented to me… They got the same answer. Those are my God given talents. Jimmy Wayne can sing pretty darn amazingly, play a guitar like it was jumping rope, and talk comfortably with a microphone in hand. I would rather sit here and type you something and hand it to you cause I don’t like a microphone all that well. AND yes, I am working on that as well. You can do this while you can do that. God just blessed me to be able to do everything that I do. He is the only reason I can do what I am capable of doing.

The night I got the Paper Angels, it was the Tuesday night after the CASA Gala. She brought them around 6:15ish. I stayed that night until after 11:00 so I could get my tree up for those kids. But, as I was decorating the tree and hanging each angel on there one by one, I guess I can say I some how kind of changed in my life. I had some great revelations. Each angel has a name. This makes it a personalized angel. It lets you know if it is a boy or a girl. It lets you know the child’s age. It lets you know the DEAR SANTA list the child wants. This PAPER ANGEL TREE has impacted me to help make a difference in some child’s life. Each kid on the tree has a story to tell. None of the stories are the same. There is something about that tree every time I look at it, it literally breaks my heart. It is the first thing I look at when I go to work. It is the last thing I see when I leave from work. And some how I see it like this, may be I am crazy… Those are my angels I have to help find Christmas for. I assumed the responsibility to make sure they all get “adopted” for Christmas. I am determined!!!

Since the tree has gone up and I have become involved with this program and then hearing Jimmy Wayne’s testimony in person (even though I have youtubed it several times before) I have something different going on inside my heart. I can not explain it. But, I guess it is the realization of being soooooooo blessed as I was growing up. We didn’t have the most of everything or the best of everything. But Mama and Daddy did their best at all times to do what they could for us. I never knew if we could not afford something. They kept that to themselves. I have heard Mama tell a story of when I first came into the world. They were down to wrapping change to pay the light bill. They made sure I had my milk, then they did what they had to do to get the bills paid.

My life is not where I expected it to be. But as I was thinking the other day, if I could go back and change just one thing what would I change. Hmmmmm. Hmmmmm. Hmmmmm. After I pondered this one for a long time, I realized I would change absolutely NOTHING. Every thing that has happened in my life, good and bad, has helped me be who I am. It has brought me to where I am. And it is going to take me to where I am going. I have NO regrets at all.

All of this comes back to let me know just how thankful of everything I am in my life. I don’t drive a brand new vehicle. Mine has 205,000 miles on it. I don’t have a fancy house. It is Granny’s old home that was built in the 50’s or 60’s. It does need some updates, but I am content with it because I do have a roof over my head. I have a business. Yes, but it is more like the business has me.

Would I be willing to give it all up and walk away??? Yes, I would and could when that point in my life comes. And even going back to the vehicle incident this week, I am so thankful to know God had His hands there to protect me. He saved me from a fate that I will not know how it would have ended. If that don’t make you wake up and smell the coffee. And this incident was less than 12 hours AFTER I got done with the Paper Angel Tree. Soooooooo thankful!

Tonight, as I was telling the story of basically what I have posted here to a very good friend of mine, she decided to come get an angel. After she got home, she went on the Salvation Army website to look at the Paper Angels and some of the things they wanted. And there was this little girl who had put down for her Dear Santa list… Her Angel simply said one word… “anything.” Wow… A child who knows that there could possibly be nothing under her tree is so thankful that she will take “anything.” She is not being greedy and making up this big list of things they do have to have. She is simply thankful for what she may get.

And even to some of these kids, the thing they want most is something they did not list at all. Because you see it can not be bought for them. If it could be bought, it would be worth all the money in the world. They simply want to be loved. They want to know they are loved. They want their mother or father to just tell them they love them. As simple and as free as it is, some parents will never do it.

Tonight, we had a testimony service of being THANKFUL. Pastor had the lights turned out in the church. It was dark. Then one single candle was lit. That person gave thanks. Then they lit the next person’s candle. That person gave thanks for the things in their life. This went on until every one had a candle and had given thanks. As I sat on the platform and listened, I was thankful that the lights were out. We are talking a throbbing, hurting heart and big tears. I sat there and I cried like a big old baby and could not really explain to you why. Everyone had similar parts of their reasons to be thankful… Family, husband, wife, kids, God loving them, Jesus dying for them, being saved and knowing they are on their way to Heaven, their church family and their church…. Then they each had another part they added to their giving thanks. Each one had a different story of the great things God had done for them. Each one totally different because each one has their own story of the goodness and graciousness of a Heavenly Father.

Sorry for being so emotional on you all. Over the last few months, I have had lots of emotions going on. I know I am watching God’s perfect plan and purpose for my life being unfolded right before my eyes. I just can’t describe all the emotions I have that just keep flowing. I know I have been called out, set apart, and chosen by God to fulfill a ministry here on this planet we call earth. He has a work for me to do. I am still not 110% sure which way He is pushing me to go. I just know I got to do what I feel in my heart I am lead to do. Where ever He sends me, I will follow in that area too! I guess sometimes you have to be completely broken out of self-mode before God can fix you like He wants to use you.

God has closed some doors just so He can show me the open doors He has waiting for me up ahead. I may be unsure of the road that is ahead of me, but I am sure God will make sure I travel down the path He has laid out for me. This month alone, He has really opened some great and amazing doors.

And yes, I do sincerely want to thank Jimmy Wayne for the challenge that he presented me with. This has been one of the life changing experiences I will never forget. So, I will put a plug in for him as well. If you love to read, purchase his newly released book “Paper Angels”. It will touch your heart. It is a book he co-wrote with Travis Thrasher while he was walking "Halfway Across America". It makes you realize just how fortunate and blessed we all are in life. Things could be worse than what you are currently going thru. I could not put it down once I began reading it... Well, I did put it down to wipe the tears!!! I completed the book in one reading at 3:41 a.m. IT is a must read!!!!

The book "Paper Angels" also set the scene for me. As I was decorating the Paper Angel tree in my window, it gave a new meaning behind those names. The different thoughts of the parts in the book actually were coming to life in my mind as I hung each Angel on the tree. All things do seeming knit themselves together in life. This whole experience was one of them!!!

Get involved in your local community to help kids. Check out the following organizations to see where you can make a difference and help a child…

Jimmy Wayne's Foundation - www.projectmmh.org

Salvation Army

CASA Organization

The Annie E. Casey Foundation - www.aecf.org

You can follow Jimmy Wayne on Twitter and Facebook. Jimmy will have a new CD coming out in 2012 as well as a documentary on his walk across America.

You can also follow Travis Thrasher on Twitter and Facebook. Travis also has written several books that are available through his website, www.travisthrasher.com.


To order your copy of "Paper Angels" you can order online at

 
Jimmy Wayne & I at the Tri-County CASA Gala11/12/11... Baxley, Georgia...

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Psalm 139:9-10


"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139:8-10

This is such an amazing TESTIMONY for me to tell… 

I just really don’t know how to begin… I can say it in one word… THANKFUL!!!

Since this is the slow season in my business, I close all day on Wednesday so that I can get things done around the house. Yesterday was my second day off since August and I, for some reason; wake up at the crack of dawn when I am NOT working… Then on the days I work, I am always fighting myself to get out of bed…

I was up early and had a list of things I wanted to go to town and take care of so I could accomplish some major cleaning and upgrading at home.  I went to town and got it all accomplished. I pulled up in the yard and parked. I did a few things around the house. Then I was ready to roll again.

A couple of hours later, I decided I wanted to go and get something for lunch. I also wanted to run by my shop for a few minutes because there was something I needed to get ordered. As I was pulling up to circle in the dirt drive way under my 60 year old pecan tree, I hit a small hole at just right angle. My little doggie had dug several of these little holes that are about the size of a small basketball cut in half during the summer. I had fussed about these little vehicle jerkers and was thinking about getting them filled in in the next few weeks.

I live in God’s country in the back woods in my county. We are surrounded by farmers with big equipment they use to tend to the various crops they grow. To say our roads (which are a mixture of Georgia red clay and sand) are as bad as a wash board that is an understatement. As you travel over them, either fast or slow, you feel like your brains are being beat loose out of your head. So, I guess that is my excuse for being a little “crazy”…

Over the period of an undetermined amount of time, these bumps and ruts had worked the nut loose on the tie rod end bolt. For those who don’t know what the tie rod end does, it holds your tire in place. It is one of the most important parts under the hood to me (now)…

As I hit that bump in the yard, thank God I did, it made the tire go higher and the bolt came out of the hole and there was my tire loose as a child’s tooth. THANK GOD this happened in my yard. I was upset at first because I thought the whole thing was broken and not just a nut off. Yes, that $1.62 nut could have either cost me my life or it could have landed a long stay in the hospital. Had I been travelling down the highway at my usual 65 mhp and it come apart, the good tire would have kept pulling straight while broken tire would have been flopping and not turning in the same direction. Being that I drive a van, it would have most likely had me rolling in a ditch some where. And I do know what else could have happened. I have flipped a vehicle before so I know what could have been.

But as I sat back and realized how I was spared, I had a true spirit of THANKFULNESS on me the rest of the day.. And even woke up with a “Good Morning, Thank You Lord” prayer..

Back in July, I was going thru some old papers and had come across an old calendar that has Scriptures on the pages. I was about to throw it away, when I decided to go thru it one more time. I turned to the page that has Psalm 139:9-10 on the right corner that reads “If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast (NIV).” AND HE PROVED THIS TO ME YESTERDAY!!!!!

Just so thankful this morning and had to share this testimony… With the Thanksgiving season upon us, I have soooooooo much to be thankful for. I will be able to share this season with family at home. Not either in the hospital or even much worse. 

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

What is "F.A.I.T.H. Jewels" all about???

I would like to take this time to tell you a little about where I came up with the name... F.A.I.T.H. Jewels.....

Last year, I went through the ending of a relationship I should have ended years ago... But, I do not regret the experiences and testimony I gained from the relationship as a whole. I am past those days and I refuse to look back. I only know there are great things waiting on me in the future.

In October of 2010, I attended a Ladies Conference here in my hometown where Micca Campbell from Proverbs 31 Ministries was the Speaker. Those who were in attendance were all entered to win copies of her new book "An Untroubled Heart." I was one of the winners. As she shared her testimony that night, it really tugged at my heart.. As soon as I got home that night, I began reading the book. And it really hit it home for me and it opened my eyes...

As I was reading and crying, I had to stop and just pray about some things I was going through at the time. In her book, Micca has the little meanings of what fear and other words stand for.

I grabbed a pen and just wrote the simple word "FAITH" that God was giving me on a sheet of decorative purple trimmed Post-It Note Paper. I looked at that word and wrote one word per line down the paper. I got an on time word from God... I had a major wow moment...

Amongst the flowing tears on my face... This is what I got...

F ULLY
A DVANCING
I NSPITE OF
T HE
H URT

This made me realize that NO matter what hurts I was going thru at the time, God was going to be there with me and He was going to help me go forward with all my might no matter the pains that had held me back in my past... My future was going to be nothing less than the greatest thing I had ever thought or imagined. I had finally realized I was going to be okay. I did not have to stay in the state I was currently in.

He only wants HIS best for us... He doesn't want us to just settle for second best. We are His children. The apple of His eye. He only wants to give us something to help us propel to the wonderful life He has planned out for us.

And we all know we are a jewel in God's eyes. We are shining for His glory. We are precious in His sight. We are a jewel in His crown.

Had you met me a little over a year and a half ago, you would not see the same person sitting here typing this Blog. You see, I was a person who had lost all confidence in myself. I was a person walking around in a shell. I was numb from everything. I thought less of myself than a human being should feel. The hurts didn't hurt as much any more. I was immune to hurt. When you hear negative things so repetitively, you begin to believe them. When you are so low, you don't think you can do any better for yourself. I was there.

But God helped me rediscover the person I had hidden inside for many years. I am happy and I know God has a purpose for me to accomplish. I work on that daily.

I may be 35, and seem to be a "brave person"  via social technology... Get me off to myself and I still freeze up at times and can't talk... I am still praying for more boldness :)

I have a more in-depth project I am working on which will give more of the details... Just waiting on the right time to do something with it....

I just hope with these and future postings, you enjoy them as much as I did sharing them!!!

God Bless You!!

Monday, November 14, 2011

8 Days of Hope - Hackleburg, Alabama - October 2011

8 Days of Hope - Hackleburg, Alabama - October 2011

(Please note... Due to some unforeseen sickness in my family, I did not make this trip... But God opened another opportunity up.. I will share that one later!!!)

by Windi Raper on Sunday, October 2, 2011 at 9:46pm

"You have never really lived until you have done something for someone who can never repay you"... One of the best quotes that will describe how I feel about this....

Every one who knows the "real" Windi pretty much knows I have a great big heart for others. I have what some describe as having a "servant's heart". I always try to help others in most any way that I possibly can. I love to be able to be a blessing to others. I am probably so tender-hearted that I need to sometimes hide from others because I give 110% in every thing that I do!!! Yes, as bad as I hate to admit it, I have been known to get a little misty-eyed at an On-Star Commercial!!! Do I have a lot of things here on earth to brag about? Not really. I have gone through some different things in my life that make me realize just how blessed I am without a lot of material things. I have learned to be content in different areas because things could have been changed and things happen a lot differently. Some times "things" don't matter as much as you think they do. Things can usually be replaced. Family and time are two things you can never get back.

Most of you know, I lost my Daddy on August 19, 2008, due to complications with Cancer. He was diagnosed Memorial Day Weekend (May) of 2007 with Stage 4 Bronchial, Liver, and Lung Cancer and was given only 4 - 6 weeks to live. By August 16, due to the many prayers and a healing God that we have, he was Cancer free. He went thru the chemotherapy treatments as well. He had two great oncologists Dr. Hoy & Dr. Anderson from Valdosta. Then, March 19, he was diagnosed with 3 brain tumors and on August 12, we found out they were half the original size. But, pneumonia set in and we lost him a week later. But, Daddy had some really good insurance that covered his medical bills. Had he NOT had that, life could have been a lot different. His insurance had paid almost $750,000.00 in less than 1.5 years. Our family does not have that amount just laying around in case of an emergency. We would have done what ever we could to get the money I assure you to help Daddy. We were just blessed he had the insurance!

I shared that story because had he not had the insurance, we would have had to sell everything we own and then go borrow the money against our property. We were fortunate because we did not have to do this extra step. But, what about those who do and then are not able to pay the loans back. What about the people who are out there and they can not meet the bills. Most of them wind up losing their homes. Everything they ever worked for is now just gone. They are now homeless and living with family. I used to work at a manufactured home lot as the secretary and in sales. The repossessed homes usually were from people who did not have the means to pay the bills due to a medical condition. I would almost say that 75% were for that reason.

We are all one second away from a disaster. We could lose everything we know as life itself in a matter of a few seconds.  We are one step away from any type of tragedy that could change our lives as we know it. It could be a diagnosis. A traffic accident. Any thing can change in a blink of an eye. You can get up in the morning, get ready for work, if you have kids you get them off to school, you make it to work... And then the unthinkable happens. Something you are not prepared for... Something so large and devastating that it wipes out everything you know as your hometown...

Many of you are very aware of the tornadoes that hit the South East back in April of 2011. Most probably don't know the actual towns that were hit pretty hard. Via the website www.eightdaysofhope.com 
  
"What is Eight Days of Hope VIII all about?
There were 216 tornadoes that hit the South-east part of our country on April 27th, 2011. Hundreds of lives were lost and thousands of homes were destroyed. Two areas were hit extremely hard. Smithville, Mississippi and Hackleburg, Alabama were totally destroyed! Thousands of home owners were affected and many are still in need of help! Most did not have the proper insurance, lost almost everything and have little resources to rebuild. This is where we come in! Eight Days of Hope is working with multiple churches and organizations to help home owners rebuild their homes. Our goal is to use the gifts that God has given us and share the love of Jesus!"

 See, no matter how much you could prepare for this tornado, it was nothing like you could expect it to have happened. Then again, most of us think "that can't happen in our area"... Just look at how close these storms really were to us. Yes, it can happen in our area.
 
As much as I would love to go on a missions trip overseas, especially China where I have a direct contact with a missionary, the more I have thought about it... What about the people right here on our soil that need helping and need to hear about Jesus? America is full of people who are hurting, hungry, homeless, and in need of something. We have such a great mission field that we ride through daily and we can't see it because we want to go to another country... AND I AM NOT GOING AGAINST ANYONE FOR GOING OVERSEAS TO HELP!!! Please don't think that by any means. Each person knows where God wants to use them.

If you get time, please youtube Hackleburg, Alabama, tornado videos. You can see how much devastation these families went through. Watching some of the footage will just make you realize how blessed we really are...
 
Many years ago, a pastor told me that Isaiah 61 was for me.. While writing this it has kept coming back to my mind... I have just literally went and reread it in between my paragraphs... It is soooo on target for this!!! Break it all down, verse by verse, and apply it to this trip. Pay close attention to the bold words... If I remember reading correctly, there was only one or two buildings left in tack in this town... I am not 100% sure where I read or heard it...

"Isaiah 61
The Year of the LORD’s Favor
1 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the broken hearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners,
2 to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn,
3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion — to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.
4 They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations."

Home... That is where you find your healing!!!

I was inspired late one night after spending time with some very dear friends I had grown up with but not spent time with in many years to write this. I had not spent a lot of time with my childhood friends and family that much in quite a few years. This being because of an out of town job that kept me gone from daylight to dark.
 
This family had just experienced a huge loss, something I knew all about. I was determined I was going to be there to help them get thru this hard time they were facing. I wanted to be there to support them in any way I could. I had just done the same thing they were going thru a little over two years prior. As I was there for them, who knew the whole time, they were really helping to heal me too. I wasn’t there to get the glory for myself. I just knew all to well what it was going to be like without having Daddy to come home to. I wanted to help them because I had just walked that hard road of losing my Daddy. Spending time with them just opened my eyes to what I had been missing for so long. The true sense of belonging some where and them just thanking me for my presence in being there with them. I didn’t have to do anything spectacular to help them. Just being there to be there for them. It felt good to know I mattered to them. It was just like I had never been away from them all those years.

With an aqua blue Sharpie marker, I was writing away as fast as I could while my tears were flowing uncontrollably. This was an enormous healing process for me. It helped me to close the door and wipe my feet on a lot of areas in my life. It also helped me to open other doors so that I could walk on thru. Being with them made me realize how important family and true friends really were. This was my first step in finding the old Windi I know but had hid her for way too many years just to fit an empty shell of a person to satisfy a lifestyle for someone else. It let me know that I really was okay just like I am. You see all the movies about people rediscovering the person they were years ago. Well, it is true because I am living proof.
 
I hope you enjoy…


There is a great difference in living and experiencing the small town life. You can live in a small town and never have time to really live it to its fullest. When you truly experience it, it leaves a foot print stamped on your heart and forever etched in your mind. It is about a front porch full of rocking chairs and swings. There is something about going back to a small town’s way of life that puts a whole new perspective on things. In a small town, people are glad to see you and they love you for who you are. Their love and friendship is not measured by the world’s accountability of a person’s financial worth. They accept you as who you are and what you are in your everyday life. It is not a matter of what kind of car you have, how big your bank account is, if you have the biggest house on the block, what kind of name tags are in your clothes. It is a matter of being your true self. The real person you really are way down deep inside. Not a character you have made yourself out to be so you can fit a make believe part just to impress someone else’s lifestyle. A small town loves the person who doesn’t hide behind a mask and is able to show the true side of life.
 
Living in a small town makes you appreciate what you have and you know it was earned thru blood, sweat, and tears. You are content with the things God has blessed you with and you aren’t trying to keep up with everyone else. You see the evidence all around you of everyone’s hard work to get and maintain what they have gained in life. It is not something to be flaunted. It is something to be respected. It is something that is usually passed down from generation to generation.

Getting that sense or feeling of home. Coming back to the roots that made you who you are. Where and why you became the person that you have become. The place that influenced your true character. The surroundings that made you believe in what a person should be. A place where you don’t have to wear a fake smile. You can let your guard down. You can let your hair down, tangles and all, and you won’t be condemned. You can be yourself and know that you aren’t going to be judged. You are accepted as you are. You are always welcome to come and visit, but you know you have to stay a while once you get there. It is a community pulled together with kindness, but is held together with the glue of the love for a neighbor. It is a place that supports you and praises you in the good times. It is a place that picks you up, cleans you off, sets you back up again, and pitches in to help you when you fall down.
 
In most families, there is a big old table on Sunday afternoons with a spread of food fit for a kings and his army. Usually that table is found at Granny’s house. The meal always had fried chicken, sweet tea, and home made biscuits. The rest of the menu tended to vary. But you had your family there and great memories were made each week.

It is the friend you can call on in the middle of the night. Knowing they will be there to get you out of a bind no matter how big or small. Then, when the task is completed, they expect absolutely nothing in return. It is where memories are made. It is where dreams are dreamed. It is where the young and the old can come together and be the same age. It is a place where you go to find that inner peace… a place of pure serenity!!! It is a place where you go to rediscover the person you used to be. You go in search of and you eventually find the real you…
   
Home... That is where you find your healing!!!

A Trip to Remind Me of My Blessings

This is a note I posted on my FB page back on June 25, 2011... Though I have posted several, this one still means the most to me.. I hope you enjoy...

"is just so thankful for all the blessings God has given me. This early morning trip to Tifton has been a real eye opener......"

This morning I had to make a trip to Tifton to the UPS hub to pick up a tux that was ordered  yesterday for a wedding for today. UPS no longer delivers to Douglas on Saturdays, so I had to start my morning a little earlier. I spend a lot of my time noticing things when I drive. I guess sometimes a little bit too much. My Daddy (who was a semi truck driver for almost 36 years until he got sick) always taught us to pay attention to everything going on around you. You know what you are doing, it is always the other person you need to look out for. You never know what they are going to do. Mainly he referred to this as not knowing what the person behind the wheel of the other car was doing so you could prevent a head on collision.

I drive and think about all kinds of stuff from my life as I see things that are happening as I pass them by. Things seem to bring back all sorts of great memories... Growing up on the little family farm. Being raised in the country with all those critters. Growing up with a family that just loves everybody.

But then there is the side of things that you have never seen or experienced you happen to see... And it just breaks your heart into a million pieces. It literally hurts your spirit. Things that you just can seem to fathom or explain... It was all  because you were so blessed that you never were forced to or had to go through the circumstances that the other person faced. You never had to walk in their shoes to know their side of the story.

I know I am a big ole' softie and my heart does overpower my thinking quite often. Yes, sometimes it can be a good quality to possess. But then, when a person recognizes that about you, you can be taken for granted. But, me having a heart the size of Texas, is the way God created me and I am proud of that characteristic God placed within me. Having a heart to reach out to others even though knowing the whole time it may not mean anything to the next person, that doesn't bother me. It has helped make me who I am today.

This morning, as I was just passing Chick-Fil-A in the west bound side of traffic in Tifton, I noticed a homeless man on the east bound side of the road. I could not see his face due to the traffic flow. He had his bicycle, his only means of transportation. What little bit of earthly possessions he has was in a tray on his bike in a white bag. His hair was in dreads and was piled up and rubber banded on his head. He had on an old worn out blue shirt. His jeans were also very worn. He had clothes on his back. Then I noticed his shoes. He had on slip on bed room shoes. The ones that are backless. Not good closed in shoes to help him pedal the bike. But big bulky shoes which I am sure got caught in the chain as he would pedal his bike. Yes, my heart broke and I got a little misty eyed.. Well, I got a lot misty eyed and the proof ran down my cheeks.

I know life is all about choices and circumstances you make and that determines where you get in life. You chose right or wrong, good or bad, better or worse... Me, with my mind running wide open as it always seems to do, just began to wonder who, what, when, and why...

Who was he? What was his name? How old was he?

Where was he from and where was he going?

What was so bad that happened to him that made him chose to live like this?

What circumstances took place in his life that made him think so little of himself that he gave up his dream and just began to settle for what ever he could to get by with?

What choices did he chose that made him possibly lose everything he had worked for his whole working life?

Did his family even know he was still alive?

When was the last time he had contact with them?

Did he have a wonderful and loving mother and father like I do and did, who would give everything to keep me from living that lifestyle???

Was he ever married and did he have kids?

If he had kids... Boys or girls? How old are they now?

What did he do in his own thinking that made him feel worthless and thought that life could not get better for him just before that point where he gave up literally everything?

Did someone offer him an addictive drug one night, and instead of him saying no, he took that one hit thinking he could handle it due to peer pressure? And then that one hit instantly and completely took over his whole life because all he could do was try to find ways of getting another hit until it completely consumed him and he woke up one morning an addict.

But most importantly...

Did he know about a Saviour who could turn all of this around for him?

Had he ever been to church and heard about Jesus who died for him?

And don't think for one minute I didn't try to go back through those stores and parking lots to find him. I did... And I failed miserably... Had I found him, he would have had some shoes and socks brought back to him from Wal-Mart since it is the only store open at 8:00 a.m. He would have had a new pack of t-shirts and a pair of good jeans. He would have had a good breakfast to fill up his probably empty stomach. But he would have also had a brand new Bible brought back to him too...

Do you think I would have done this? Yes, I would have. I have done it before. When I was moving into the shop here at my current location around January 1, 2010, there was an older homeless man who I noticed in town a couple of days. He carried a bright blue sleeping bag. It was freezing outside. That second night, I went home and got some of my Daddy's clothes and rewashed them so they would be really clean, packed them in a suitcase that had wheels for easier travels, and brought it to the shop the next day. Not only were there clothes in the suitcase, I had a couple of towels and wash rags, some toiletries, some canned food, a couple pair of new warm gloves, a new throw blanket, and most importantly on top I placed a Bible for him. But, he never showed back up...

Am I telling this to get credit for anything? NOOOOO, not by any means what so ever...

Now to be real... Some days, I wake up and think what if this or what if that. Sometimes, I wake up and wonder is there anything any worse than this or that. Or what else could happen. If I could change this or that would it make it better or worse than what I am going through right now. Or simply, can it get any worse, really????

I was soooo blessed to have a mother and a father, a brother, a grandmother (all my other grand parents were gone before I was born), aunts and uncles, cousins, a niece, and lots of great friends I knew I could count on who kept me in check. Most importantly, I knew that if everyone walked off and left me, I had a God in Heaven who I knew was there for me and loved me. Am I perfect, no where near it. I just try really hard to do the best that I can in my walk with Him. I know God has placed a special calling on my life. It has been spoken over my life many times. Just waiting on the right season for everything to come to fruition...

I have a house that has power, air, and heat. I have means of transportation to go back and to to work. I have food in my refrigerator and cabinets. I have clean, running water.

Yes, I have a business. Sometimes my job completely stresses me out. But to be able to meet different people that come in and be able to share the Gospel in MY shop without being threatened by a boss or supervisor, well, that is priceless!!! But I also realize, it is here today and could be gone tomorrow.

This has been one of those things that I could not wait until 4:00 to get here today so I could write this... I know there are some of you who will read this and think I have absolutely finally lost my mind.  Well, just so you can consider yourself warned, this is a first of many more to come!!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this through. It really means a lot to me.  Thank you and God Bless You!!!

Just an update... please go read part 2 of this... God opened a door for me to complete my missed blessing!! here's the link..  http://windiraper-faithjewels.blogspot.com/2013/06/a-second-chance-to-complete-missed.html